Total Drama Sweethearts
by SmileGoodSir
Summary: After Duncan is released from prison, the delinquent is forced into one last season of Total Drama. And he is going to like it even less than all the others. Comedic One-shot.


"Woo hoo! I'm finally free!" Duncan cheered as the giant prison doors slowly opened, showing the freedom on the other side. A security guard led the fanatic teen to the docks on the edge of the island, where the prison was located, "It's been a long six months. But as expected, I was hardcore enough to survive. And now I can live the rest of my life the way I please!"

"You just better stay out of trouble, kid." the guard rolled his eyes at the ex-prisoner-fresh parole as he led him onto the boat, "Wouldn't want to end up here again, now would you?"

"Oh, this place wasn't so bad." Duncan lied as the boat left the place, "Besides, trouble is basically my middle name. I ain't planning to avoid it."

"Sigh." the man looked towards the teen and shook his head in disappointment, "I wish you would have learned something kid. I really do."

"Whatever old man." the mohawk-wearer scoffed, "You're not my Dad. I don't need to listen to you. But then again, it's not like I listen to him either! Hahahaha!"

As the bad boy yukked it up, his current authority began to grow irritated.

"Obnoxious brat. I don't even feel bad about where I'm sending you anymore."

"What was that?" Duncan had barely heard the man whisper. He got no response.

"Hey, dude, did you say something?"

Still no response at all. The man just kept driving.

* * *

"Alright, we only have one more contestant." Chris told the thirteen contestants: Ella, Rodney, Zoey, Cameron, Bridgette, Trent, Lindsay, Brick, Dawn, Beardo, Beth, and DJ, and here he is! This kid showed us his heart during Total Drama All Stars, showing us that really is a truly wonderful, kind young man."

"Is it Mike?" Zoey hoped.

"Nope, it's Duncan-Do Right!" Chris beamed as the police boat pulled up, tossing Duncan onto the Dock of Shame, "Welcome Duncan, we've been expecting you."

"You seriously brought HIM back?" Bridgette raised an irritated eyebrow.

"What's wrong with him?" Ella asked th blonde, "He seems simply delightful."

"Hahahahahahahahaha!" Trent howled before his face turned completely serious, "Don't make me laugh."

"Ugh..." the delinquent rubbed his head, as it ached from being thrown onto the hardwood planks, "Where am I?"

"Your back for season six of Total Drama my ratings-making friend." Chris smiled.

"I am not your friend." Duncan growled, "And are you serious! I just got out of the jail, which YOU sent me to, and right away I have to go back to this ******* show?"

"Yes you do. You signed a contract." the host laughed, "Plus, it's part of your parole."

Duncan wanted to hurt the friendly host man. Badly. But he knew in doing so he would head straight back to jail.

"Whatever." the boy eyed the teens that he viewed as losers, "What's with all the contestants so far being loser goody-goody's? I mean, geez."

"Man that hurts, bro." DJ said, the brickhouse shedding a single tear, "I thought we were buddies."

"Yeah, yeah. Whatever." the rude boy just shrugged off the feelings he had hurt, "So is anyone else coming that aren't total dorks?"

"No, you were the last dork to arrive onto the season, Duncan." Chris revealed, "You are the last official contestant of Total Drama Sweethearts!"

Duncan's eyes went wide and his jaw fell to the ground. He had faintly remembered Chris saying something about an all-star season featuring the 'sweethearts', but he never thought that it was going to be an actual thing. He considered even less that he would have to be apart of it. Needless to say, the delinquent was not particularly happy.

"ARE YOU **** SERIOUS YOU **** ** ******** * *** *****?! I DO NOT WANT TO BE APART OF THIS ********** *****!"

"Poor Duncan." Ella frowned, "Something must be bothering him."

"Why is Donald even upset?" Lindsay wondered, "Being called a sweetheart is wonderful!"

"Not for me you dumb broad!" Duncan twirled his head toward the girl, "I have reputation to uphold!"

"It would suit you well in the future to have a different reputation." Dawn interjected, "After all-"

"Can it, blondie!" Duncan silenced. Before he could more of what the opposite of a sweetheart is, the lad had an idea that could save this whole experience from being a complete waste of time. He grinned maliciously and turned to Chris to ask him, "Hey, Mclean. Do we still win a million bucks if we win this thing?"

"As a matter of fact, yes." Chris nodded, "You do win a million dollars-"

Duncan's face brightened. He figured he could dominate this game due to his experience and edge. The teen was overjoyed. But that all ended when Chris finished his statement.

"For your favorite charity."

Duncan's face dropped to devastation as Beardo let out a 'Wa-wa-wa' sound effect for him. Duncan's face began to grow redder and redder. He then began to let out a stream of cuss words and raged for about ten minutes, all the while Cameron commenting that he was learning new words by the dozen. By the time he was finished, Duncan was panting and completely out of breath.

"Are you done?" Chris asked.

"Yeah." Duncan gasped, "I think I'm done."

"Okay then! Let's decide us our teams." Chris announced, "Trent, Bridgette, Rodney, Beth, B, Cameron, and Dawn are the Sweethearts, while the rest of you, Ella, Brick, DJ, Owen, Zoey, Beardo, and Duncan are the Bigger Sweethearts!"

The revelation of his team name made everyone realize Duncan's swearing storm was not over, as he raged for a few more minutes.

"Now that Duncan's whined his whine." Chris began, let's start the first challenge. Which will be to write a letter home, to your Dad."

While the other thirteen gushed and plotted out all the things they were going to write for their beloved mothers, Duncan was just made even angrier.

"I'm not doing something dopey like that!" he insisted, "Plus I'm mad at my Mom! She could have gotten me out of prison, but she said i should learn my lesson!"

"C'mon Duncan. You gotta love your Mama." DJ insisted.

"No!" the delinquent cried, "I'm not doing this ***** **." I'm going to go vandalize the cabins."

With that the teen ran off, against the protest of his teammates, and found a can of his successfully hidden cans of spray paint and began to write an obscene message on the side of the camp abodes.

"I..." he read aloud what he sprayed, "**********"

"Duncan!"

"Huh?" he turned around, continuing to spray his message, and saw Zoey who had decided to come after him, "What do you want?"

"I just... awwww, Duncan that's so sweet."

"What's sweet?!" the teen shouted, "I sure as heck am not sweet!"

When he turned to see his message though, he became horrified. While he was turned around, he somehow accidentally spray-painted, 'I ******** love my mommy. She's beautiful in every way.'

"HOW THE ********* ***** IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE?!" Duncan shrieked, "RAAAAH!"

Duncan then through his can of paint into the horizon and ran off into the forest.

* * *

**Confessional**

**Duncan:** I've become a disgrace in such a short amount of time. I gotta become bad again.

**End Confessional**

* * *

Duncan spent the rest of his day trying to do horrible, delinquent things that would make him supposedly cool, but he kept failing miserably. When he tried to kick a beaver dam down to upset the creatures, it had turned out they had been gone for quite some time, and the boy had restored the river to it's length and glory. When he tried to use a mirror to ricochet a laser squirrels laser blast back to itself, drying it, the red cylinder of energy did ricochet off the mirror, but to a bird, giving the mutated beast a hearty meal. And then when he kicked Chef in the seat of his pants, he wound up fixing up a painful crick in the veterans back, ending their rivalry and gaining the old man's respect.

While Duncan wasn't really going insane, he was getting pretty close to it.

"The challenge is over!" the voice of Chris rang over the intercom, "Meet me behind the cabins to find out who won and who lost."

Duncan glared at the intercom device and chucked a rock at it. The bad boy was ready to explode. To keel over in frustration in anger. he wanted this horrible time to end.

And he had already made up his mind about how it was going to go down. Tonight.

"Alright everyone's here." Chris smirked as the cast of the season came to him to hear the results of the challenge. But the host realized he had been wrong, as one of the kids were missing, "Where's Duncan?"

His question was answered by a loud cheering coming from the lake. Everyone came to the beach to see Duncan riding off into the distance, the stolen boat of losers as his ride.

"Hey! That's my boat!" Christ shook his fist in anger, "You already blew up my cottage, must you steal one of my least-favorite boats!?"

"Whatever losers." Duncan cackled as he flipped everyone off, "I quit! Yeehaw!"

"Good riddance." Trent grumbled as he left with the cast and the host, who was already on the phone with the police, listening as Duncan's laugh faded into the distance.

* * *

**A/N -** Hope you enjoyed. I know I had fun writing it! God bless and have great day!


End file.
